The Rook

After a very dark day yesterday in which I moped a good deal about the passing of Carlin, I am now returning to the world. Whether I like it or not, I expect to be employed very soon and I want to make the most of this time away now.

First things first. Our address book:




For an explanation:




Second things second. G and I went on a little outing on Fri/Sat. For more info, click the cut.

( vacation snaps: Be Warned )

I am, therefore, enormously sad.

Carlin was a huge influence on my sense of humour and philosophy of human interaction, and seemed to have been a decent person.

He died last night of heart failure at age 71.

Shit, piss, fuck, cunt, cocksucker, motherfucker,and tits.

Part of growing older is outliving all your heroes. I realize this, but they're hitting me hard these days.

Tomorrow I'll post some pics of where I was this Saturday. It was very nice.

I'm very busy with the job hunt right now and havent been posting for this reason.

The mixup at See has been resolved, and my piece will be published tomorrow as part of First Person.

Yay!

Looks like See published G this week instead.

Perhaps next week?

I'll have to call the editor.

Hi there, everyone.

I have another installment of First person in See Magazine in tomorrow's issue. Yay.

I'd like to take this moment to have a little joy.

Several years ago when I moved to Edmonton, I was pretty ground down. Family issues, issues of poverty, and the feeling that said poverty would be with me always had left me a wreck. I was creatively drowning, and personally miserable.

Moving to Edmonton made me feel even smaller for a little while. The city seemed unfathomably big and cliquish.

The money, if nothing else, was better. So too was the realization that I was, in fact, qualified for any number of cool jobs, and could be valued for them. No more was I in the land of 7-11 workers with doctorates.

One of my early dreams was that I would one day write for See. See impressed the hell out of me, and seemed unbelievably cool. I thought it was a pipe dream.

Years later, here we are.

I'm happy and confident of what I can and can't do. I have finally finished a book, and am shopping it. And, I'm writing freelance for See.

It's a little dream, but it happened, and I complain enough that I should probably share when I feel joy as well.

I feel a little bit cool, and a little bit hip.

Yay!

Once again the divine Ms. G is in See Magazine . This time she's one of the critics for the best in Edmonton Feature, as well has having the last word so to speak in First Person.

Yay for her.

I have begun the new book, and in the coming week will be, as promised, making major changes to the ol' web presence.

It occurs to me, i never did answer why I'd asked about the face vs limb sacrifice.

i wanted to be sure I was on board with my character's decision when she is offered the same choice.

Thank you for your input.

Thanks to thunderhowl, we've found the article is up. Awesome.

Click here to read it.

For those of you here in Edmonton, I have a short piece on the back page of See Magazine in tomorrow's issue. It's an installment of their regular "First Person" feature.

You may remember that G was published in the same feature a couple of weeks ago. So, yay!

I will post a link to the article for their online version when it becomes available.

Hi there, internet.

I haven't been spending much time with you lately. I've been dealing with real life issues, of late, and my creative energies have been focused in two places.

1) I've been revising the book. I finished the second draft this weekend, and the third draft today. I've sent it out to a bunch of folks, and am hoping that, with their comments, I will finish the fourth, and hopefully final draft before the end of June. I am now allowed to start the next book.

2) I have been preparing a revamp for Fishclock. I have a plan to use Fishclock as my main blog from now on. I will be updating it every Monday, and occasionally will post between them. It's going to be focused a lot more on writing, and on editorials and commentary. I won't be getting very personal there. This blog will keep on keeping on, but will probably be sporadically updated at best. I may shut it down temporarily while I'm job hunting.

I think my reason for that should be obvious.

The first draft of the book will be taken off Fishclock during the revamp, so if you want to read it, and haven't, you should hurry.

I'm hoping to get Fishclock in place over the next week or so, and then get to work on the new book hardcore.

My job hunt is also going to intensify, though I am determined to find a good one. I can afford to be choosy for a change.

So, i hope all is going well with you. Is rickrolling still a thing people do? I've lost track.

      I live.

     My panic about money is slightly better now, though I expect to be stony broke for most of May.

     I am working on the second draft of my book pretty intensively right now.

    If you have any notes for me, again, now is the time to share.

    Once the second draft is finished, I will be removing the first draft from this blog, and from Fishclock for a while.

    Best, if I'm to shop it, I think.

    So, let me ask you all something.  It may seem strange but I have a reason for asking.  I'll explain that later.

   If you had to sacrifice a limb or your face, which would you pick?

As binarykitten said:

what we have here is the top 106 books most often marked as "unread" by LibraryThing’s users. As in, they sit on the shelf to make you look smart or well-rounded.
- bold the ones you've read,
- underline the ones you read for classes (at least once),
- italicize the ones you started but didn't finish,
- * if it's actually on your bookcase and you haven't read it.

( Here's Me )

Here's the deal:

As geeks, suffused in geek culture, we are inclined strongly to be tolerant. We excuse a lot of socially awkward and stupid behaviour because we know that a)we all have our areas of stupid, and b)the pain of ostracism.

Geek culture is centered around the idea that Ostracism is Wrong. There's some value in this, honestly, but there are dangers.

If we're honest, we know that every group of geeks has a subset of people who lack social propriety to a degree that makes them troublesome, and a cause for concern. Often, it's the bathing issue. Sometimes it's the lech issue.

We keep these people under close watch, and we often find ourselves having The Talk with them. Sometimes they grow up. Sometimes they don't. Once in a rare while one of these individuals actually gets ostracized. They stop getting invites, and it's a stigma to associate.

Often an act of actual violence is the final spur that leads to this.

We can, as a group, do it when we HAVE to. We sure do everything we can to avoid it.

That means, unfortunately, that the genuine sociopaths and creeps among us can get away with bloody murder. They push the boundaries, and they push them and push them. Our lives are made complicated and awkward, and finally we fo what we have to.

Geek culture needs to really absorb the thought that for a lot of these social misfits, there is no reasoning with them. The only thing that will get the needed behaviour is the fear of ostracism. Even the worst of these creeps will tend to improve sharpish if they really believe they are going to lose the last group of humans who will still talk to them.

We need to move up the line considerably of what it takes to get the fucking boot. I'm not saying that if we disagree on something one of us has to go, but I think we know there's a basic standard of social decency and behaviour. By my estimate, about 1 in 5 of us is below that standard on a regular basis. It's not a high standard. I mean bathed, and not grabby. I mean, polite, and looking at the eyes, not the tits.

Geek culture needs to step up its game, or we will never stop being looked at like the bottom twenty percent of our numbers.

I am, at this point, disappointedly certain that you have heard about the Open Source Boobies Project. This happened at Penguicon. Google it if you want, I'm too frigging lazy, and disgusted to bother.

Long story short, at Penguicon, thanks to a core group of fucking social retards, women wore badges that either permitted or denied permission to people who wanted to touch their breasts. This was cast as a fucking open and honest social movement to expand fucking consciousness.

( more under the cut. I got ranty )

In short: Geek men-check yourself before you wreck yourself. And stop tolerating it when your friends are assholes. You owe it to yourself. You owe it to every woman you love, and you woe it to the fucking culture.

Geek women-Learn to say no, to mean no, and find some way to police your culture. I am a sex positive sort, honestly, and I don't want the whole "virgin/slut" dichotomy that has been so fucking harmful since oh...forever, but you need to find some way to shun or punish those who break the social contract the same way we do for our guys who are too creepy to be borne.

If there's anything that can be done by the men on that front, we need to step up as well. So let us know what we need to do. Much of the interaction in the private world of women is mysterious to you.

Here's the first new one. Featuring...not me.


Talk to you tomorrow.


A moderately better looking version is here.

Edmonton(AP) Addressing a crowd of reporters at a press conference this morning, Edmonton raconteur, curmudgeon, unemployed bum, and media superstar The Rook delivered a prepared statement expressing his thorough distaste for all human endeavour.

"Lame. Fucking lame and repetitive," The Rook said, "And snow at the ass end of April? What the fuck? I mean seriously."

Ranting for a full ten minutes on the state of human lousiness, The Rook finished by snorting, and hocking what can only be called a greasy loogie into the throng of reporters.

He then answered questions from the assembled crowd.

When asked what brought on this mood he replied that a sense of despair and malaise had been slowly building for a week or more, and that the decision to transmogrify it into a hard and shining jewel of total rage was a decision based in self-defense. He then called the reporter a total cunt with delusions of adequacy, and asked if she really thought that a three hundred dollar skirt made her special.

He then invited the crowd to fellate him and, finding no volunteers, terminated the press conference.

Anna McCabe of the popular website www.totalmeltdown.com said that it was the finest display of dickmanship that she had seen since the Mickey Rourke/Kim Bassinger fistfight of 2002.

"The Rook really fucking snapped. I think he was crying at the end, as he pointed to his penis and screamed 'Suck it! SUCK IT!' It was awesome, and I don't know of anyone outside of The Church of Scientology who is going to top it this year," McCabe reported.

Online reaction has been mixed. One poster, identified as PartialHERM@inlinetoswedethrone said, "If he really wants to be fellated, I just want to support him in that. If, on the other hand, this breakdown was a hoax, I may stop attempting to lick his balls altogether." Another, named ANGRY@USASK simply called it a faggy fit.

Since the press conference, The Rook has not responded to any comments.

Sorry about not posting yesterday. I was engaged in house cleaning, and the Horror Of What Was Behind The Couch drove me temporarily insane. I'm better now. Mostly. Mostly.

I'm hoping to do some actual filming today for video blogs. We'll see if I can fix my lighting issue.

I dreamed last night that I was on a reality show, and was the second eliminated contestant. It was a cyberpunk kind of deal and I got eliminated by being "killed". The premise seems to have been that there were a number of locations on what was left of Earth and that the outside world was inhospitable. We went from place to place by using these co-location gates. Just before I went through one to get to the "auditorium" one of the hackers fucked the controls and put me on an infinite loop so I kept coming back through the gate I was entering, and I "starved to death".

I remember I turned to the hacker, and told them that was well played, but I was really bummed because I was having so much fun in the game, and had to leave.

Considering it was cyberpunk themed, it was a very weird show involving dancing and singing competitions.

Reality shows are very much present in my mind lately. I'm not sure why.

Okay, I am. As my next vblog will indicate.

I don't work for Apple.

That is all.

More Monday.

Hi there, folks. Still working on the video blog stuff. It's not going well. It doesn't help that, at the moment, I can't stand the sight of myself. I don't know why. Just one of those moods, I guess. They will come, however, but I don't want to build them up or anything.

So, in the meantime, I'm hanging around the house, and dogsitting for a friend today. As usual Spenser has a new best buddy, and Desi is being a bitch.

I'm also still revising the novel. If you are one of the multitude, please get me your comments as soon as possible. I needs them. A lot.

I also am outlining the new book, which used to be All Things Will Be Raped, but which I should title Mass Market Suspense Paperback. Seriously. What I did was I wrote down all the popular and ginchy themes that seem to make books go wild on the charts, and I picked six out of a hat. Now I'm making that into a story that is maybe tongue in cheek, but hopefully genuinely cool and fun. It's also tied into the Sel Souris cycle of stuff.

Aside from this, I have little to report, except that Gayleen finally has confirmation as to when the 3Day Novel Contest is airing. Click on her name for more info.

I do feel, strangely, like human interaction, and so, I'm throwing the door open to you here. Interview my ass. Leave me questions, and I will answer them in one way or another. Video submissions are also welcome. If you have one, drop me an email at therook(at)telus.net, and I will give you access to submit your clip.

Let's see if I can get my talky muscles primed.

I hope they'll be worth it.

I've been distracted by various real world concerns, and haven't been able to really focus.

This is probably to the good. I have a job interview tomorrow, and I'm very nervous.

I also am still so angry about religion that, honestly, people should just leave me alone on the topic.

Rational or not, I'm in a friendship-ending, bridge burning, scorched earth kind of a mood about it.

And I think I'm okay with that.

Well, Happy April Fool's Day.

I did, in fact, have a big plan. The plan was to do this whole born-again thing for three days before stopping, getting more and more ludicrous every day until I "returned" on the third day.

I lost the taste for it. I have a bad taste in my mouth.

I try not, believe it or don't, to be a mean person. I do. Snarky, yes. Mean, no. I try to be patient, and tolerant, and it takes a lot further than many people realize to actually make me mad.

But I have to say something.

Some of you people, dear readers, are stupid humourless fucks.

And it pains me, because this blog has a very limited readership, and a significant portion of you were either a)taken in by what was a VERY FUCKING OBVIOUS gag, or b)offended.

Most of you were not, and good. To the ones who were, I will say this: grow up, or stop reading.

I'm an artist. This blog is one of my outlets. Once in a while I talk about my life and how it's going. That is a fucking sideline.

I write. I tell stories. I use the False Document method a lot. I don't intend to stop. If you're a stranger it should have no impact upon you whatever. If you are my friend, and you have concerns, drop me a fucking email.

I can understand some misgivings. People misunderstand the purpose of this blog. I'm genuinely sorry to anyone who thought the Sel Souris diary was real, and was hurt by it. On the other hand, I think that was one of the best pieces of writing I ever did. So I have mixed feelings.

But, on April 1, to receive some of the comments I received and some of the emails I got made me sick. Actually, physically ill. My stomach hurt. I almost kept to my planned course out of spite.

I'm not a spiteful person. So fuck it.

If you're offended by my opinion on your religion, so be it. You religion kills people fucking dead. The entire Abrahamic tradition of religions has scarred the world almost past repair. I'm offended that back-alley abortions were made a necessity in 1/2 of the world by your religion. I'm offended that a large majority of the world feels I should be stoned because I am capable of loving a man, because of your religion. I'm offended that children are indoctrinated in dangerous and superstitious nonsense long before the age of reason by your religion, and that is considered good family values. I am offended on behalf of all the friends I've seen emotionally devastated by their parents in the name of your religion. I'm offended that wars are fought for oil and glory, and justified in the name of your religion.

I hate your religion as much as it hates me.

That's a lot.

I'm a magician. I'm aware this is a nonsensical spiritual belief. I'm aware it seems silly and strange to you. It seems silly and strange to me. I don't spend my whole life talking about it. I don't think non-believers are evil. I think they're sensible. I don't think magic is for everyone. I'm not sure it's even real. I think I've seen magic do real things. I can't explain it. That interests me. I am, however, pretty sure that magic is applied psychology, unlocking parts of our creative mind.

I don't think that those of you who mock my beliefs deserve to drown in a lake of fire. I see no need to crash a fucking car bomb into you.

My religion, if so it can be called, and I dispute that, is without dogma or clergy or politics.

If it developed those things, I'd repudiate it. As you should repudiate yours.

Those three things make it a tool for mind control.

Stop calling yourself a Christian, and I'll stop calling you an idiot. Most of you don't believe the doctrines of your church anyway. You pick and choose the parts that suit you. That's one part good fucking sense, and one part cowardice. You want the freedom to believe as you like, but the sense of inclusion in the group that the label Christian gives you.

Whatever. That's all the negativity I have in me right now, and I'm sorry to spill it out on the just and unjust alike.

Wade, it would have been an awesome gag. Sorry.

I'm taking a few days, and I'll be back, as requested with some video entries. They may even be funny